I am all for finding that one special person in your life, and several times I thought I had. Eventually I will, but most of us have a totally different problem. The problem is we meet someone, maybe not even date them once, and are convinced they are the “one.” Unless you’ve known someone at least a 6 months, they are a “maybe” at best. It takes that long to get to know someone at a very bare minimum.

We all hear stories of people who meet and marry within a month, sometimes with a week. It rarely works out. Yes, sometimes, but there is no hurry. Relax and take your time. Anything else is simply insane!

Everyone is a “yes,” “no” or “maybe.” OK, some people may be “no way” and we’ll include them as a “no.” When you know someone for less than six months, regardless of how well you are getting along, regardless of how perfect they seem to be, they are at best a “maybe.” A “maybe” is a potential “yes,” but hasn’t been proven yet. We all want a “yes” and the best way to find a “yes” is to have multiple “maybes.”

Now I am in NO WAY suggesting being a womanizing (or manizer) or cheating or anything other than complete honesty

Don’t lie. When it came up in conversation yesterday with a fabulous woman I’ve dated a few times, I simply was honest. She’s great, I’m enjoying getting to know her and spending time with her, but we barely know each other yet. I am open to meeting other women and go out on occasional dates with others, but I really hope things work out between us. It is just way too early to know or make any kind of commitment other than being open and honest with each other.

She didn’t necessarily love my answer, I’m not sure, but it was truthful. Incidentally, the woman has to be the one who suggests (sometimes strongly) that you are exclusive. If you are not ready, don’t lie. You do not have to be perfectly forthcoming as in “I’m really not sure about you (yet)” but do not lie.Some people may never find a special someone, they may need a special more than just someone. Some people are polyamorous, but that is a different topic and doesn’t describe me, at least I do not think so.

And a word about the word “relationship.” If you are seeing someone more than once a week, it’s a “relationship” regardless of whether or not you use those terms. This still does not change what is written above.

Remember, be honest, but if you have been dating anyone for less tha six months they are at best a “maybe.” At very least, be opening to seeing others.

Categories: Video chat